Do you HomeSchool?

I have a soapbox....come join it, or leave it behind-it's a long one!

*I was at the dentist office last week and a mom-of-one was sitting there staring at me as I was trying to keep the kids under control (they were doing a GREAT job of obeying) in the tiny waiting room.  She started asking me parenting advice, as she was expecting her 2nd and just didn't think she could handle two kids under three years old.  I really tried to empathize.

*I took all the kids + cute Spencer Weenig (he was staying with us for a couple days) to the new Children's Museum two weeks ago.  While they were busy slamming themselves against walls lined with mattresses and having a massive pillow fight (IT IS A FEATURE AT THE MUSEUM...my kids were not misbehaving!!!), a couple from LA struck a conversation up with me and thought I was a daycare provider (!!) until she really saw how all 7 kids looked like clones...even Spencer could fit in this family with his coloring.  This couple had their 1.0 child and they were done.  They started asking me all sorts of questions about kids, parenting, two-year-olds.  They even searched me out an hour later and were relieved to find I hadn't yet left so they could ask me more parenting questions.  Since when did I become the expert?

It's funny how people perceive you just because you have a gaggle or a basketball team, or a herd...whatever you'd like to call 'it.' Either they stand in judgement....or they gawk & send a lot of praise.  I do realize that most people just weren't meant to be parents of more than a few---or choose not to be... and bless them for that!  Some days I wonder what that would be like, but most days I'm thankful....especially now that school has started.

*Again, I ventured to OC to take Brayden, and the other kids + Spencer to Sprinkles and then Ruby's on the Huntington Beach Pier for his birthday lunch...just something different.  My kids, Brayden in particular, gets embarrassed when people stare.  He was embarrassed a lot that day as people stared in disbelief.  We get that a lot here in Cali.  It's only because they are two sets of 'stairs'...with a four year break in between.  Two older couples made a point to come up to me at the table and to tell me how well-behaved and beautiful they all were.  

"Bless You" is what I hear a lot.  Yes, I need it.  I need the little snippets of goodness and well-behaved 'moments' so that I don't feel we're running a freak show over here all the time.  It's physically, emotionally, spiritually EXHAUSTING.  And yes, I am blessed, we are blessed.  I need to feel that more often.

Then with all these conversations came THE question .... the one I get a lot--

"Do you homeschool?"  

"Why?  Do I look like I homeschool?"  Do homeschooled children typically act better in public?  Don't know, but my instant answer is always, "I'd rather be shot."  Isn't that awful?  I don't judge those that choose this path, but I guess I really just don't understand it.  So you homeschoolers....educate me!  I'm a proponent of public schools in general, Elementary Education is my BS, experience, and background, so I know the public education side of things.  No, it's not perfect by any means, but I just can't fathom sheltering my children from society.  Do you pull your kids out of the public system because they're little genius' that are getting lost and you don't want them to skip a grade?  Or are you just not getting involved enough in the education process...in the classroom to know really what's going on?  Seriously, I want to know--what motivates you?

I have a 'friend' that is a queen social bee, a very self-centered person generally, goes on 4-6 lavish vacations a year who recently decided to homeschool.  I think it was for the freedom of not having to explain to the schools why her kids were absent for yet another week... with super tanned bodies sporting new island wear.  They quickly ran out of dead grandparents and illnesses. Flexibility...yes, it offers that.  You can stay in your pj's.  Sounds good to me, but not generally a healthy mental thing.  You aleviate the taunting, teasing, bullying that normally occurs in this very rude world.  Unless you belong to our family where taunting and teasing go on constantly anyway.  But does that properly prepare them for normal life experiences?  And curriculum...Christian-based or in my case, Book of Mormon-based...HUGE plus,  BUT aren't we teaching that anyway in our homes?  Shouldn't we already be establishing "A house of prayer, house of fasting, a house of faith, a house of learning, a house of glory, a house of order, a house of God" without homeschooling?

 It takes a generally patient person to be a successful mom of six--jury's still out on how successful I am, but in case you're wondering, I can't fathom homeschooling--   

E V E R!  Not even in my vocab.  THAT takes either a really special saint-of-a-mom or an insane one.  I know quite a few of them.  Mostly they're saints.  Nothing in between.  'Joy school' for little three-year-olds--maybe.   But I really question if homeschool is the best thing for kids in general.  I derive my sanity from the hours of oh, about 8-3.  So maybe I'm selfish?  Or maybe I'm just real and that's my only way of maintaing a healthy balance.  There are just some moms that are more capable, adventurous, more selfless than me.  Or maybe their children really struggle to behave or function in mainstream society so their parents choose to shelter them, or to straighten them out for a period, then send them back to be better citizens?  I don't know--maybe I'm ignorant.

I think it's important for the kids to venture out in the world as little people.  As long as they're being taught righteous principles and virtues at home, I have NO PROBLEM with them being taught by very capable teachers at school.   Don't they need to learn how to pick good friends?   You get the good with the bad, yes...but socialization and interacting with peers is so important...learning what normal voice tones are and learning to get along with a myriad of different personalities and situations, having the opportunity for leadership experiences...making their way in this crazy world.  

And the best part? They know they have a pair of super supportive parents and the open arms of a loving family to come home to that have gained some extra sanity from 8-3...everyday....{IF their room was clean & their job was done --otherwise it's not such a loving mom greeting them on the other side of the door.}

I guess life is a series of choices, and hopefully prayerful ones.  These choices are the beauty of our agency, and I suppose some are cut out for the task and some are just not,  I'm a  N.O.T.